Today I want to share with you some guidance I received from Susan, who has lost a breast due to cancer and has shared her tips on how to disguise it (and other scarring which can happen with surgery). I’ve created some pictures to illustrate her advice.
I am a great fan of your website and have been following it for some time now. Thank you for all your insights.
Reading the post on horizontal stripes reminded me of a challenging time in my life when I could have used a little sartorial advice. When I was only 40 I lost a breast to cancer. Not surprisingly, I was extremely self-conscious about my irregularities, from the time I was stuffing a sock in my bra, to post-reconstruction when I am still lumpy and lopsided (but glad to be here!). Those initial months I learned a few tricks to disguise my asymmetry without hiding in oversized sacks. I thought I would like to share.
What to Wear When You’ve Had a Mastectomy
1. Obviously, avoid stripes like the plague. In fact, avoid all geometric patterns. All-over, asymmetric patterns are much better.
2. If you prefer solid colours, cowl necklines and ruching are good disguisers. Looser, button-up shirts are also easier to wear.
2. Loose layers hide a multitude of sins, even over a close fitting top like a T-shirt or turtleneck.
3. Scarves and shawls are great to drape over the chest, and to fill in a scarred neckline. But don’t overdo if you’re also wearing a scarf on your head.
4. Keep attention high with interesting earrings and shorter necklaces. Don’t wear long necklaces that dangle over the bustline.
5. Wear (the right) colour. It’ll make you look healthier and feel happier, to help you through the dark days ahead.
Unfortunately, where I have been unable to find much of a solution is in eveningwear. Itseems almost impossible to look “sexy” in our society without showing a lot of decolletage. Anything I could find to hide my scars and my prosthesis-supporting bra only made me look matronly. Highlighting your back (if you can) or legs might be an alternative if you can find the right outfit. Imogen, any suggestions you can offer would be greatly appreciated.
Susan
Thanks so much for sharing your tips Susan! Here are my tips for evening wear:
Choosing Evening Wear When You’ve Had a Mastectomy
My evening wear suggestions keep going along the same guidelines as you’ve already provided:
1. non-repeating all over pattern
2. Asymmetrical details and design (any sort of asymmetric plays tricks on the brain, stopping it from noticing what else about you is asymmetrical)
3. Texture (such as lace) and dark colours (which recede)
4. Big shiny earrings and necklaces above the bust to draw attention upwards
5. A large shawl in a gorgeous fabric to drape over your shoulders
Don’t forget that you can use silicone breast forms rather than socks. And if you need a special bra fitted, there are bespoke bra makers and fitters like Linda you can go to for help.
If you’re in this situation, what have you found really works for you?
Wow, Imogen! My respect and admiration for you. Very creative article, you’re taking your information beyond with the intention that despite the circumstances life bring us, every woman can look beautiful with these tricks you give us.
Thank you very much and hope you continue to have energy to publish your interesting blogs for much longer. Nice day!
Alison – thanks for your lovely comment. It really means a lot to me.
I lost a breast at 30 and wear a special bra and prosthesis. Ten years later I’m happy to still be here, but I still find dressing a challenge! Most difficult is the fact that it is impossible to show décolletage, and so many summer fashions and evening/formal wear seem to demand it. Thanks for the very helpful article.
Fiona – thanks for your thoughts and sorry to hear you’ve been through such a terrible time! So glad you’re still here.
Loved this article. Could have used this advice when my sister In law had a breast removed. It is also hard to dress when preparing for reconstruction. Have put it on my fb page and hope lots share this info.
Debbie – thanks so much for sharing. I’m sure there are many who will appreciate it.
Great topic. Handy for people who are naturally asymmetrical, too.
Very true!
Thank you for the amazing ideas. I was really worried on what kind of clothes i should wear when i get back to work. Right now i am recovering from mastectomy and auxiliary dissection
At a time when a woman is struggling with both health and self-image issues, and trying to retain her femininity despite after losing a breast, this type of simple but helpful information is absolutely invaluable. I will share this with a dear friend who is in exactly this position. Thank you!
Thanks Angela!
very nice posting for the blogger who has lost their Brest. Thank you so much.
THANK YOU for this wonderful post. Even though I lost a breast seven years ago and wear a prothesis, I am still heartbroken about the change to my body and find that dressing is a challenge. These are very interesting and helpful suggestions!
So sorry to hear of your loss Lindy – I”m glad some suggestions are helpful
JUST AN INTERESTING STORY….I went out to dinner and drinks with my husband recently. I do not wear a prosthesis and most of the time no bra. This evening I had a compression tank top under my t-shirt, which somewhat flattened my one breast. A man across the bar (about 10-12 feet away)- could not take his eyes off my chest, for a least 20 min. I guess he has never heard of BC. I am so over certain men and at my age (74) I don’t really care about my actions. Finally, I had to let him know how inappropriate he was ( I did it as nicely as I could), I guess he was taken aback by anyone speaking up. I’m sure he does the same to women who have 2 breasts. He quickly left the bar- Good!
Great good for you Ann .I twas diagnosed with aggressive, invasive breast cancer in 2006 . My surgeon said it was stage four doctors say stage 2-3 okay whatever it was still aggressive and invasive. Doctors told me the first year was crucial and I had a 50/50 chance on beating it and the breast cancer returning and hitting my entire chest wall.within the first year . Well it’s been 18 1/2 years .Well I to suffer from my one breast loss . Especially when it has taken what feels like a part of me . I am small breasted .. Even though I had small breast and larger breasted women we all feel like we are no longer desirable and excepted as we once were . My doctors wanted me to speak out anyway I could to people who are going through breast cancer or have went through it. My doctors say I am a miracle . You know what people women you are loved and you are beautiful and more desirable then ever . Do you know why WE BEAT THIS TERRIBLE DISEASE AND IN MY WORDS “ THE DEVIL MAY OF BROUGHT ME TO IT “ 👺
🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼“ BUT GOD HAS CARRIED US THROUGH IT .” 🙏🏼 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼
GOD BLESS US ALL 🙏🏼
Keep smiling , keep shining “ l WEVE GOT THIS. TOGETHER “ 🤗🥰