What It’s Like to Be an Introvert and Other Weekend Reading


I’m an introvert. In fact if you know about Myers Briggs Psychological Typing, I’m and INTJ. I find crowds difficult. I prefer one on one or very small groups when interacting. Sure I’m happy to get up and speak to hundreds of people, but I need you to come and talk to me afterwards, don’t expect me to work the room. This was an interesting piece about introversion, and yes, I’ve often been told I’m a snob, when in fact it’s just that I’m introverted (and was also very shy as a child).

23 Signs You are an introvert


Some books on the subject


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  • I found her point that extroverts don’t necessarily always have the best ideas an interesting one. In a group situation where the extroverts are loud and talkative, they are often viewed as the leaders….In fact, if they were purposely quieter for some time, they might allow some others with leadership abilities to shine and contribute value input, as well. As an introvert, it takes too much effort to compete, and find the extroverts suck the energy not only out of me but the whole room. lol. And I’m sure I am thought of as uninteresting or boring because I stay quiet when things get too energized.

    • I know how you feel. Image consulting is a pretty extroverted business in general so I often feel like a boring wallflower when I’m in groups of them. I’m part of a mentoring group that works because we are all introverts.

  • I have an introverted son. This caused me concern, because as an extrovert myself I misinterpreted it as shyness or a lack of confidence. I came across an article by Susan Cain, and it gave a me great insight into his personality type. He’s the way he is, he is self reliant, there is no need to fret about it.

    • Vicky – I’m so glad you now have a greater understanding of your son and that there is nothing wrong with introversion! It’s an interesting thing. I think that introverts have much more of an idea of what the benefits of extroversion are, but extroverts have little insight into introversion (can’t tell you how many times I’ve been told I’m a snob or think I’m too good by extroverts who don’t understand that it’s just an expression of my introversion).

      • Imogen, why do you think that is? Do you have a theory about why extroverts might have less insight into introverted ways than the other way around?

        • I think it’s because introverts are more introspective they notice more about others behaviour patterns. I’ve asked my extrovert friends over the years if they can imagine what it’s like to be an introvert and they just can’t, it’s like it’s so far out of their way of being that it’s too foreign.

          • Reminds me of the day my extroverted sister said she got a glimpse into my brain when she took a road trip with a friend who talked the whole way! (laughing!) She said she was exhausted by the time they arrived . I do find my few extroverted friends start to understand me over time, just from the way I describe things. I try to give them exagerated examples that they can relate to.

  • Meyer Briggs and energy obtainment is crucial in my opinion for successful and understand of oneself. I am an ENFJ – which does not fit a lot of work places.

  • So fascinated with the # of fellow INTJ and INTP ladies I am seeing amongst the Image Consulting industry. I have long been obsessed with color, and had a natural knack for proportions, & wanted to become certified to do PCAs as a “side career” to my corporate job, and perhaps even a full-time one eventually. I was holding back, thinking maybe I would not be a good fit for this kind of work b/c of my INTJ nature. I’m feeling really encouraged by this! πŸ™‚

  • I’ve started to save for the initial investment! Target goal: 1 yr. I’m excited about learning to do something that utilizes my decisive analytical skills & visual intelligence/intuition, & can make ppl happy. πŸ™‚

  • I just read THE ABCS OF IMAGE – COMMUNICATION (awesome post, by the way, I loved it and can totally relate) and was going to comment to see if you’d read Quiet by Susan Cain – but after going back through the links you posted there, I now see you know of her from her TED talk and it’s funny to read this as I’m INTJ too πŸ™‚ I am totally looking forward to two nights on my own in a hotel room next weekend πŸ˜‰

    • I’ve actually just finished the book Quiet Chelsea and it was fascinating. I am lucky that both my kids (who are with me 70% of the time) are more introverted too so they also appreciate a lower volume on life. As much as I love my family holiday I’ve just had to lock myself in the bedroom for a while to get away from the noise. The 5yo never ever stops talking or singing or making noises, he’s much more extroverted I suspect!

  • I have downloaded it on Audible and cant wait to listen to it. My 6 year old is incredibly extroverted and it’s great because when there are other people around he’s happy to talk to them, but when it’s just me it’s nonstop and very hard for me to recharge. I think one reason I love blogging and social media so much is because I can choose when and how much socialising to do – and when to do it. x

  • I’m also an INTJ and thankfully we are all introverts in our family. Although I love spending time in small groups, I definitely need some down time! Apparently INTJ is rare for a woman. https://owlcation.com/social-sciences/INTJ-women-A-rare-Myers-Briggs-Category

    My pet theory on extroverts is that they don’t understand that we don’t like parties per se – they just feel that if we tried THEIR party we’d understand how amazing parties can be. I’d much rather have dinner with two close friends.

    • I like parties where I know everyone, but find parties where I don’t really hard work and will tend to talk to only 1 or 2 people rather than mix and mingle. That’s my INTJ way!

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